Everyday: Think About It

With palms together,

Good Evening Everyone,





Everyday is a wonder. I look at my hand and marvel at it. I look at my other hand and marvel at it, as well. They couldn't be more different, yet are of the same body. One moves with ease and has tremendous sensitivity. The other hardly moves and when it does it curls into strange twists and strains almost against itself. I feel one, barely feel the other. Just so, my heart/mind.



I consider the cause. A single bullet to the right side of my head on May 29, 1966 is the obvious cause. But equally present was my youthful willingness to go to war. My culture's willingness to have me go there. All of the propaganda, all of the socialization, and religions unwilling to stand up and shout against the grain, "There is another way!"



When I returned from combat, I decided I could no longer support war. Talk is cheap, though. So I protested. At that point in the Vietnam War, people didn't like protesters.



All the same arguments I hear today. What would you do if.... You know, enemy at the gates, etc. Sometimes I feel like doing an Arlo Guthrie on them, "I want to kill!"



Killing should be personal. Perhaps if it were, we might have less willingness to do it. Its easy to drop bombs, fire rockets, and artillery. Even easier with unmanned drones. No muss, no fuss. That's not real killing.



Real Killing is torture. It never stops. There are few days that go by that I don't have a memory of killing. My hand and my rather oddly shaped head see to that.



Yet, on the other hand, my heart/mind spoke loudly when I saw the Trade Centers attacked. Some terrible stuff, that. "I want to kill!"



Yes. And then what?



If the violence is far away and the stench not in our nostrils, no problem. Imagination is a poor simulator. For those who do violence, up front and personal, things are different. As we Buddhists are prone to pontificate, a moment is an eternity. As an Infantryman I attest to this truth.



And that dog eat dog crap is just that, crap. Real survival is based on mutual aid. You want to be strong? Love your neighbor even if he hates you.



Practice to create a pause between thought, feeling and behavior. Reject violence and warfare. It leads to nothing but more of the same and, believe me, it stinks. Practice the gentle way, the way of care and love. Hard, I know this, I am still struggling with being loving, tender and compassionate. Yet, I am convinced this is the way.



Life is nothing if not a great teacher to those willing to learn.



Be well.