With palms together,
Good Morning All,
Yesterday afternoon there were several police cars and emergency vehicles practically blocking the place. People were milling around talking and watching and waiting.
A five year old boy was found dead at the bottom of our complexes hot tub. There were lots of people swimmming in the pool adjacent to it. Attempts by several residents failed to recuscitate him and he was pronounced dead 45 minutes later at the hospital just a couple of minutes away.
The morning newspaper reports that there is a criminal investigation in progress.
My sense is that this investigation will focus on parental neglect as the mother was heard asking if anyone had seen her child and she was at the pool with him. We must, it seems, have someone to blame when such things happen.
My heart goes out to this family. Not only have they suffered the loss of a child, but now will suffer an investigation, public opinion, and possible criminal prosecution.
On one hand, this was a senseless and preventable death. Hot tubs are dangerous as the shift blood pressure and people can suffer injury in them as a result. Young children should not be allowed to "play" in them, and certainly not without close and immediate supervision.
On the other hand, holding a parent responsible for not watching a child every moment, or an apartment complex responsible for not having fences and signs and all manner of safeguards, is also a dangerous matter. Both create situations where someone must be held responsible always. Our legal system is flooded with such actions, both civil and criminal.
Left out of the equation often is the indivdual within situation, as well as a good and balanced sense of what the limitations are for us all in protecting each other from ourselves. Children are by their very nature curious and playful. They do not understand risk and have limited capacities for evaluating dangers. Many adults suffer the same or similar limitations. We do things without reading the labels, climb ladders with tons of stuff attached to out bodies, act as if we were flying squirrels and die, then our families sue. There should have been a warning about carrying two six packs, a hammer, a box of nails, a four 2x4s up an unopened step ladder braced against the wall of a house.
As faith based people, inclined toward a moral and spiritual path in life, we must focus our compassion on all concerned. Blame can be, but is not always, compassionate, although action to prevent further harm is. Shoulds and oughts are fine for the sake of discovering ways to prevent another injury, but do no real good in terms of correcting what has already happened. Judgement will not help us here. Good sense and an open heart will.
Our belief is, as insane as it is, that we should somehow be able to prevent every mis-step imaginable and if we don't then somehow we are remiss to the point of criminal culpability. When bad things happen to good people, and we are all good people, we must embrace each other with loving kindness and work hard at letting the judgements go.
Be well.
7 comments:
thanks sensei.. not sure i agree with you here. but what do i know..
Brave and inspiring words. Thank you, for writing what could not have been an easy essay.
Jeff, perhaps yu will explore this some?
Spydre, thank you.
this is that little boys aunt in ohio. First of all, austin was 4 years old and anyone with a 4 year old knows how fast they can move. Second of all, he had arm swimmers on and his mother told him to stay away from the hot tub. he took the arm swimmers off and got in without her noticing because the hot tub is surrounded by large greek pillars that are easy to hide behind. When his mother realized he was missing she searched the hot tub first and then the bathroom. the problem was that the apart. complex had let the tub become so cloudy that she could not see to the bottom (which is required), plus she was 4 months pregnant and afraid to get in the hot water afraid she might miscarry for no good cause, she was very high risk. Also you may like to know that at the time this happened the complex had already lost its license to have a hot tub 12 times and currently did not have one because they did not properly take care of the hot tub and allowed it to become so cloudy. If the mother had been able to see to the bottom then he would still be alive today. So before you go making judgements know your facts. "wrongful death"
zsexaDear d lacey,
thank you for posting your comment here. I do not see how my facts are incorrect. Which fact are you talking about? I say we should not make judgements and you say I am judging?
The hot tub has bubble jets. It is impossible to see the bottom, period. The complex did not let the water get cloudy. I am in that pool pretty much daily and I can attest to this.
This was a terrible accident and, as you say, children are very quick and often do really stupid things. Parents cannot keep an eye on them every moment and a complex cannot be responsible for what a parent and a child do or fail to do.
Sometimes bad things happen, even to good people.
Be well.
AND BY THE WAY no charges were filed against the mother, but they are suing the complex for neglect of property and wrongful death. and the daddy is one that puts his life on the line everyday to protect your way of life and keep the mexican gangs from entering your perfect little world!!!!
Dear Lacey,
My heart goes out to you. There is no reason for you to unleash your anger at this situation here. I hope the courts find an appropriate resolution to thew issue. Frankly, however, I do not see anyone is at fault in this tragedy.
As far as the Border Patrol goes, they do a great job with limited resources. However, my life is far from "perfect" and I think you might considere your words a bit more carefully. Most illegals coming here are not in gangs, they sare workerrs wanting to find work.
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