Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Teacher?

With palms together,
Good Morning Everyone,

Well, two seders and I am still alive. First night a Jewish/Buddhist seder, second night with close long time friends. I guess the question is am I free from bondage?

A friend in the Tricycle Community has asked about that. He wonders if I am not too attached to my robes, title, and well, I suspect he thinks I am full of myself. He wonders whether people would respond to me any differently if I did not hide behind these masks: if I were just plain Harvey.

I don’t know. What I do know is that I am told various things by various people about myself. Some are not so pleasant. Some are quite pleasant. In either case, I work on not allowing them to stick. Teflon Zen.

It is a difficult question, though. Most of my adult life I have been a person with some degree of authority: a man with a gun hunting other men in combat, a child protective services social worker and supervisor, a supervisor of mental health services in a school system, a Ph.D. psychotherapist, a director at a psychiatric hospital, and finally a Zen Teacher. I am quite “used” to being in and using authority.

My sense, though, is that I wield it with a considerable degree of humility. I reveal too much of myself at times, I listen to crap being dumped on me sometimes, and I care deeply about those who do the dumping, as well as the world in and around me. Robes and the like are just part of the trade. They are my personal history that goes with my kechimyaku (Zen Bloodline) and Shukke Tokudo (Home Leaving Priest Ordination).

Forget the robes, the title, and the like: just cloth and words. Forget my teaching, as well. These are my words, put on my experience: not your words, put on your experience. Above all do not confuse the two.

Be well.

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